Entries for July, 2004
July 3rd, 2004
Diploma Holder POSTED AT 03:12 PM Reached back at around 7.30pm on Thursday. Friday, I went to the Pg college to get my gown, meet people, attend briefing. Had lunch at the Tanjung Bunga market - chicken rice (with that yummy kiam chai boey) and shared hokkien mee with Ivan. Hehhe. I am a PIG... oh by the way, I saw a wild boar. Thursday morning. I was walking to the college using the hostel shortcut. Beside the shortcut, it slopes down a little and there's a little dirt track, more slope and then the kampung. Well, I heard some noise, and these three girls in front stopped to stare, so I looked over as well. What I saw was: a wild boar chasing a chicken. I don't know if it was actually chasing the chicken, but it looked like it.  Okay, anyway, back to Friday, after meeting lots of people, went out for dinner with parents and Francis. He's leaving for Singapore on July 19!! Caught Malaysian Idol after that, and had a few laughs  Convocation was... quite boring. Yeah. Didn't get to meet the press. Sigh. Ms Ng said no more... then we left... then after that she asked where were you? I think it was a Chinese newspaper anyway. talk to me!
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July 7th, 2004
mixed emotions POSTED AT 12:48 AM Had an ok trip back to KL... ended up having to use the LRT anyway because James our driver only knows PJ. Sigh. So yah. Reached back much later than expected. I skipped cell on Monday to go lepak with Josh and Mei Phing. I arrived late... *sorry*... and my directions were a little sesated so we kind of almost got lost, but not quite. This morning I lost my Squirt the Turt(le)!!! Waaaaaaaaah...  Entered the DK at about 8 am, took hand phone out of pocket to check time... and "ARGH!!! Where is my Squirt!!!" *Sniff* Can't find him.Went for CF. They talked about sharing your personal testimony. One question I really hate, but they always ask, is 'when did you become a Christian?' I really don't remember. I just know it was like a gradual thing. I remember waking up at night sometime in primary in Sibu, maybe Std 3, asking my mom to pray with me the sinner's prayer again because I wasn't sure if I was really saved. But I know I'd prayed it before. I remember rededicating sometime in form 1. I remember a lot of starts and stops but somehow I'm here, having grown a lot, and yet still sometimes asking, "how do you know what you say you believe is true?" and also asking "are you sure you believe what you say?" So I guess for me it's a continual renewing or building on, unlike when an unbeliever (prebeliever) comes to know Christ for the first time and *BANG* something really special happens. Anyway, about the audition thing, I'm in the chorus. Yay, hooray and whatever. I kind of really wanted to get the Lea part. Felt some pangs of jealousy when May said that she was called back for a second audition for that part. But well... I guess it's okay. Anyway, since I'm like only in the chorus (practice only once a week) I joined the CF camp committee. Praying "God, please don't let it be a very sporty kind of camp." (Yuin, they mentioned Tapah campsite and Broga... I'm going to DIE!!) help...
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July 8th, 2004
look what I found! POSTED AT 03:49 PM Anyway, see gallery: sem1 Listening to: Break Me Through [Bebo Norman] |
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July 9th, 2004
hyper hyper POSTED AT 06:27 PM I went out with Josh yesterday. Met him at KLCC after my class at 8. We had LATE dinner (nearly nine - or was it past nine?). Anyway, we had lekka lekka (sp?) and KFC. Yep, deserts before dinner. Yeah. Talked about a lot of stuff... from college/uni to English to Literature to uh... music to erm... lots of things. Got back home about 11pm (early yah? But LRT station closes early too) and went to sleep. I got up early and washed clothes!! Finally finished my tax assignment... hopefully we do well Finishing English (almost). Will be doing the final referencing later tonight and then Yit Sien (group member) will be printing it. En Yee will be doing the powerpoint. Yay. So presentation on Tuesday. Pray we do well yah! It's 30% of my final marks (I think). THEN I will have to think of FMC assignment. Sigh.Dum dee dum... Still a little hyper. Don't know why. But not so much since I had a short nap. Does lack of sleep make you hyper? |
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July 10th, 2004
almost... POSTED AT 12:08 AM I'm in the CF camp committee (I said that before, right?) as the secretary (sigh... why?!) and I mailed the minutes to one of the committee who has printer AND internet, and was frankly a little offended when he wrote back saying, "great piece of work, first time in months that I don't have to edit what I print." Silly right, because it implied that he expected my work to be bad. But anyway, I realised that I'd probably jump to the same conclusion knowing the level of English in TARC. Don't feel like doing anymore work, but I have to!! I could always pass it to my group members to complete... but then I'd be worrying all the while. Stupid huh? I always want to do the final bits so that I can edit everything to satisfaction. I don't trust their language skills.
Listening to: Voice of Truth [Casting Crowns] |
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July 11th, 2004
AF rocks - a concert review (part 1) POSTED AT 09:23 AM So anyway, before the thing started, I just sat there thinking, and I had this ‘revelation’. I don’t think you’d call it a revelation. It’s just one of those thoughts I have that I always forget. Shall I post it here? Nah… that would be too long. Anyway, I’ll upload it in fictionpress under “ramblings” (“artistes”). So just check it out when you have the time. Met some of Edrian’s friends – Lydia, Wan Tze (sp?) and Yvonne… Joanna was there. Found Xavier, my CF president, there and dragged him to sit with me in like the second row. I was initially sitting somewhere about the 4th row or so, but the first 2 rows were SO empty! FireBRANDS would take the opportunity, right? Yah, but not alone. So drag poor unsuspecting friends. Heh. One thing I hate about Malaysia is the Malaysian time. Well, I like it when it works for me, but most of the time I hate it. I understand being 15 – 30 minutes late… but 1 whole hour? The event was scheduled to start at 7.30pm. People were still straggling in. At 8.15pm the emcee comes up and I’m thinking ‘whoo-hoo… let’s start!” but no – he plays games (to give out freebies lah) for the next 15 minutes. So we only started at about 8.30pm. Oh, backtracking a little to before the games, Andy Yeoh and David Gary sat in the front row, in front of me and asked whether they have seen me somewhere before. Frankly, I was shocked. Maybe because I’m normally the type of person who forgets faces unless they’re shoved before me (and I talk to them) more than twice, I assume that everyone is the same. Anyway I mentioned that I’ve been to Acts Church because that was the first time I remember seeing David Gary (was it him in the veggietales tie or was that someone else? Anyway, I remember the tie.) And because that was the first time I sort of heard of the band (or at least of Andy) when we sang “Exalt” and “Give It All Away.” I mentioned Penang concert and Andy was like “oh yeah… Anna right?” Or something to that effect. read on to part 2 - splitting it up so it doesn't get truncated like last time |
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July 11th, 2004
AF rocks - a concert review (part 2) POSTED AT 09:25 AM 1. I Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For (U2) 2. Why Georgia (John Mayer) 3. Change The World (Eric Clapton) Admittedly I was a little blur when they sang these songs – I don’t really listen to secular music, and even when I do I can never remember who sang/wrote them. But for the record – the choruses were familiar, so it means I’ve heard them before. Anyway, I got the song list from David Gary after the concert (thanks!) and searched them out online for the lyrics. (Question I need answered – is U2 a Christian band?) Yeah, so song 1 goes: You broke the bonds and you / Loosed the chains / Carried the cross / Of my shame / Of my shame / You know I believed it / But I still haven't found what I'm looking for and he ends with Until I found Jesus Leading on to the next which went: Still "everything happens for a reason" / Is no reason not to ask myself / If I am living it right / Am I living it right? Song 3: That I can change the world / I would be the sunlight in your universe / You will think my love was really something good / Baby if I could change the world 4. Running Back To You (AF) Ah, this is still my favourite AF song! I was really blessed that they sang it. It goes: How could I walk away / From all I once knew / Promises I held on to / Who am I kidding? / Who am I fooling? / And to think I can live like this? / No… / Can’t keep on running away from You / Can’t keep on living this lie I’m in / Letting it all go I’m turning around / I Hear you calling me so I’m running back to You / An angel by day / A devil by night / Don’t know who I am anymore / So very confused / And so conflicted / I just can’t take this anymore And yes, being a Christian for so long (come to think of it, I was in church even before birth! Heh) sometimes you wonder if you’re really being a true believer or just another hanging on hypocrite. 5. What If I Stumble (DC talk) 6. Understand (Jeremy Camp) When they started playing “Understand” I was like… “Woah! Yay!” and when Daniel Wong started singing, I was like “Oh my gosh…” He sounded almost (at some parts) like Jeremy Camp himself… and Jeremy Camp is one of my (current) favourites. I was thinking Trixie would knock herself crazy if she had gone. Yeah anyway, I still like “What If I Stumble” – What if I stumble, what if I fall? / What if I lose my step and I make fools of us all / Will the love continue? / When my walk becomes a crawl / What if I stumble, and what if I fall? 7. Real To Me (AF – pre-release) New song slotted to come out in their new album (when will that be? Hmm…) Chorus a little repetitive - It is real to me / and it sets me free – but then again, so is Camp’s Understand (I know You understand it all / So why don’t I get back on my feet again). Some more context could be added or it might sound a little new-age-y. You know, that "whatever works for you is fine" thing. 8. Free (Steven Curtis Chapman) This was new as I hadn’t heard it before. Must be on one of his really-much-older albums. I really liked it. If the Son has set you free / you are free indeed Anyway, after this song, Ps Julie shared a little and had altar call summed up by Ps Lim. Then we had some praise style songs and a rocking time. 9. Jesus Party (AF) 10. One Way (United) All in all, I was really blessed last night and I’m glad I went. The band really grooves together. David Gary is tops in bass (Edrian wanna take classes, huh?) Kysern’s guitar is impressive (to me). I love Andy and Daniel’s voices. Oh yeah, and I still remember Agnel breaking that bass drum thingy in TOG, Penang. |
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July 13th, 2004
SIGH POSTED AT 06:09 PM And then I went to McD for some comfort food (laugh all you want) and the silly lady there was like totally blur or something. First, she gave me Spicy chicken when I asked for Original. And then, she didn't give me a spoon for my chocolate Sunday. And she nearly forgot to give me my chips!! Well, anyway, the chips were soggy... the spicy chicken was ok lah. I went to get a spoon for the ice-cream and they gave me one of those big ones for the bubur ayam type. And the vanilla coke was SO flat, it tasted like sugar water with vanilla flavouring. Went back to ask if can change, she said that they were having problems with the machine, so all the drinks were like that. So I said, it's okay then. And she asks "Do you want extra ice?" I'm like... huh? It tastes so... bland and you want it to taste even more bland with more ice?? Okay, then a group member messages and says that the financial report for the Manufacturing company can't be used. Earlier she said the Construction one couldn't be used... and then can be used... and so I don't know what the heck she's trying to do. And I'M the one who has to look for it now. Sheesh. And then I had to write an e-mail to Ps Sivin Kit to ask if he can speak at our CF camp... cos Rowen (the one who actually knows him) doesn't want to. Not really complaining about that lah, but... whatever. =/ Still have to do that love offering letter thing... Okay, other random info. Nick Lee, producer of Altered Frequency is from SIB and is pastor Lindy's boyfriend. Ps Lindy is my cell leader. I bought Snickers to cheer myself up and looking at it makes me happy already. Hahhaahah... New stuff up at fictionpress and some person really likes it... (still trying to figure that nickname out... communistpinko???) Yah. CF camp is 27-30 Sept at Peace Haven. (Ish.. keep typing PEACH) Uh. I'm sure I had more random stuff that I was thinking of on Sunday. But oh well, forgotten dy. |
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July 13th, 2004
oh yeah POSTED AT 06:41 PM You see that pic down there? That fella, Andrew, is from my CF... and he's in Malaysian Idol! Vote for him!!! I actually don't even know him personally or anything, but whatever. |
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July 14th, 2004
other random info before i sleep POSTED AT 12:19 AM  Yit Sien was like... "she speak Chinese??" and kind of laughed.Anyway I realised why the rap part in Jesus Party just doesn't sound so nice at live concerts - the original in the CD was done by Agnel, not Andy. I still don't know what is happening with my FMC assignment. I'm checking my mail WAY too often. I'm stuck on chapter two of Renewal Theology. My side of the room is getting messier. I've been having a gassy kind of stomach today. Room 104 has two large posters - one of Arwen and one of Aragorn inside above the bed, and as the door is usually open I get to see it often. Room 114 has a nice poster of ROTK on the outside door, and as the door is always (usually) closed, I get to see it every time I pass too. It rained. I'm sleepy. I'm distracted (or trying to distract myself) from being more frustrated over the English presentation and the FMC project. I have 4 movies to watch - the Matriach, The Matriach II, The Patriot and School of Rock. I will probably reward myself after next week's Tuesday deadline by watching 2, if not all 4 shows by Wednesday. Good night. Pray for me. Oh yah, and pray for Rowen, our camp coordinator, who is proving to be very blur and a little disorganised... and camp is in about 76 days - and we haven't even finished the proposal yet. And exams are in about 40 days as my mum was telling me, and Young Women's encounter is about 6 days before exams and I'm going for both. (Does that make sense? Whatever.) Good night. To quote Rowen, "What nonsense la u." Thank you, I know that. |
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July 15th, 2004
*sniiiifff* POSTED AT 03:55 PM Yesterday's was one of the worst blackouts since I came here. Well... I kind of enjoyed it though. It was de-stressing. Haha...  I was JUST about to go and bathe at about 4 when Trixie came over. So we chatted, talked music, exchanged CDs, and she wanted to see some stuff on the comp. So we were looking at things, and just as she was going to approve a Friendster testimonial, EVERYTHING WENT OFF!! Yeah, it was about 5 something then. So we talked... did nothing... later went to bathe... left at 7.30 for dinner - still no electricity. The main traffic lights at the Genting Klang Road was off - still no electricity. Good thing where we ate, at Desa Setapak, there was electricity. Finished eating Bak Kut Teh, left the place at about 8.30pm thinking 'aih, sure late for CG'. Traffic jam at the traffic lights because there was still no electricity and no one was giving way to anyone else at the junction. Anyway, got back to the hostel at about 9 and there was no CG cos outsiders weren't allowed in when there's no power. We spent the time chatting outside the college gates. Well, not all of us. Wai Yi and I were chatting with Rowen, Solomon, Rebecca and Xavier. Trixie wandered off to play ball (in the dark) with Belinda and another girl. (Can't remember her name.) Xavier later joined them. Manfred and Abu (abbreviation for King Poo or something, don't ask me why) later joined us from where ever they came from. We watched this generator van come in and wait and wait and leave without seeing any power restored. So we went mamaking at Desa Melawati for lack of anything better to do. And besides, it had lights there. Reached back at about 11 plus, nearly 12, and still no electricity. Sigh. Anyway, went straight to bed. I think the power came back only at about 2 in the morning or something because I woke up to see the fan turning. Yeah. Today was my presentation... it was ok I think. But I think my English teacher was a little rude. She scolded the group after ours and kept interrupting them by telling them to "summarise, summarise" although they still had about 5 minutes to go when they cut themselves off short. Still looking for financial reports for my FMC project thing, but I know pretty well what to do already so I'm not [as] stressed as when my group members were telling me all sorts of nonsense. Tonight going to meet Vincent to discuss SIB cell stuff for Monday, tomorrow going to visit the Carnival and then get all my FMC done (probably can get most of it done tomorrow afternoon, type it out in the evening, compile everything by Sunday night / Monday, and pass up on Tuesday.) |
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July 16th, 2004
random ramblings POSTED AT 12:08 AM Well... I found out that Andrew is Ps David Swan's son. Hmm... Poet and musician. Tomorrow till Sunday is TARC carnival... and it's on from 10am - 10pm. Feeling a little guilty that I didn't sign up to help at the booth  Eh... people... talk to me! Leave a few words at the taggy or at the comments la... I feel like I'm talking to myself. (Which essentially I am, really). Nicky's gone and deleted his blog. Joanne (this girl in my CF) was thinking of deleting hers. You know, I just think that blogs are one of the most wonderful things in your life. It's public enough to be like a letter to the world telling them what you're going through, and yet private enough to keep your deepest thoughts to yourself. (Like tabulas has private & friends only entries.) Most of all, it's a memory of what you went through. I like that. Maybe because my memory is really terrible. But even if you remember events you went through, you don't usually remember all the emotions you felt. And a blog captures and keeps that (provided you wrote about it). Which is why a blog should never be deleted! Left for a while, maybe, hang your "AWAY" sign or whatever, but preserve it for you to be able to read it again. And realise how much you've changed. You know, I was talking to Josh (the other Thursday when he was here) and I'm still thinking a little over what we were talking about. Well... I think that this is my "season" for writing. Some how, stuff seems to flow. Not that long story (Tim is still stuck and shoved aside, sorry, KK) but short stuff. Poems. It just seems to come. On the other hand, I'm pulling more away from the drama stuff. I mean I still love it and everything, but I'm seeing more and more that sometimes, drama is just not me. Don't ask me why. I was watching Jane, this acting coach person for Drunk Before Dawn, and I'm thinking - I don't have that kind of personality - that spontaneous, dramatic flair. I don't think I will ever become an acting coach of any sort. But Josh was saying that it's there - that anointing thing when I act. And maybe it is, but I don't see it. Maybe I need to find my proper niche still. I realise I'm a more script-type person. But most of these acting thingies are spontaneous. And I realise I still have a long way to go. So many things to learn.Another thing I was thinking about was music. You know, in a strange sort of way, I'm thinking of writing songs. But I have no idea about how to go about creating melodies... capturing them, getting chords or whatever. It's just sometimes my poems come out sounding so song-y and I'm wondering what would happen if it were really put to music? Fascinating. And I'm surrounded by so many poem-y and music-y people now. Hm. It's an interesting network. A lot of the people I know (I've been adding peopleon friendster) know other people I know. Solomon apparently knows Joss. Rowen knows Kin Yan. Andrew knows Kin Yan and Jason Ding (where I got the pic of Unabashed from). They also know Justin Ng - who was someone that my cousin introed to me on ICQ (haven't met him in person). It's like everybody seems to have connections with everybody else. Wow. And I know all this through friendster. Even more interesting. But bah, I'm really rambling now. |
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July 17th, 2004
Happy 20th, Josh! POSTED AT 01:15 AM Watched Malaysian Idol (and after that that American Idol thing... really cracked up.) Hey, but the finalists are pretty good yah? Just uploaded a new poem blossomed. Not too crappy eh? I was actually thinking of seeing some *ahem* person talking with some *ahem* person under the streetlights... in the carpark... and later seeing them hold hands. Haha. I don't think they will come here and see this (will they?) and I don't know if anyone who knows will come here and see this, but whatever, hey? Late dy. Night. Tomorrow more carnival. Sigh. Maybe will pop in at CF booth. Met Joss and Eli today. That Ben cabut-ed... so didn't get to see him. My CD drive (F: ) giving problem... Tried to play a CD, couldn't read in Real. Tried with Windows Media it played a few seconds and then kept skipping tracks. That also happened when I tried out School of Rock yesterday. The other CD drive (G: ) is still not being read by the computer AT ALL... and my friends' disk is still stuck inside. And I keep having to restart the computer cos it jams while loading up. WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE?!?! CAN ANYONE HELP? Feeling: happy yet frus. ahha |
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July 17th, 2004
An Ode... POSTED AT 08:30 PM Please, my dear, won’t you work for me? My computer is STILL not reading its CD-ROM drives... I just borrowed some music CDs so now I have to use my walkman. And I don't know how I'm going to watch those VCDs I borrowed. And FMC is not going anywhere fast. I really have to concentrate. Sigh. And I'm hungry. Buh-bye. Gonna find some food... Feeling: nothing |
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July 18th, 2004
Miracle worker! POSTED AT 01:20 AM I'm still stuck on the assignment which I really want to finish now! It's due on Tuesday, but my group member's parts have to be sent to me still... (probably by tomorrow) and tomorrow I have a) church in the morning, b) drama practice in the afternoon and c) Odyssey night at night and I'm thinking of going because Wai Yi's aunt got us 4 free tickets. Sigh. Which means I have to do my part NOW (it's already one am!) or Monday (argh... frus... rush... late!) Which better? Don't know. I saw a dead frog on the road just now... You know what? After dinner, at about 9.20pm I walked ALL the way from hostel to college to see if the CF stall was still open as David really, really wanted the Casting Crowns CD. After all, the Carnival is from 10 am to 10 pm, right? Reached about 9.30pm really tired, to find them packing. So asked Rowen to see if he can get it for me tomorrow because I don't think I'll have the time to drop by tomorrow. *crosses fingers* Having fun spamming Joanne's guest book thingie and her friend Raymond is going to burn for me Switchfoot! Yayness!! If you see this, thanks!! I'll remember you for life! (I think.) Gah. Gotta get to work. Need sleep. Sigh. |
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July 18th, 2004
blessed assurance, Jesus is MINE... POSTED AT 10:30 PM My mum just reminded me that used to be my favourite song when I was a kid. I remember typing and re-typing several copies of that song in red and black ink on our trusty old typewriter (the era before computers). Unfortunately, I can't remember all the words now anymore. But I love the chorus: this is my story, this is my song, praising my Saviour all the day long We sang this song in SIB this morning and it reminded me of just why I wanted to join SIB in the first place (besides and before the musical came up). I remembered the first cell I went to. I really felt like crying in the worship. I think I did. And it was just SO wonderful, because it had been a long, long time since I did anything of the sort. It was just that feeling of "God, I don't want to run anymore. I don't want to make excuses anymore. You know I've been drifting, and I'm coming to the end of myself. Just take me." And May shared... and I wanted to cry again. Because she was being so real. The first service I went to, I wanted to cry in the worship too. And they just HAD to sing "Draw Me Close To You." It's one of those songs, that if I'm feeling bad, or far away from God, if I sing it, I'll just start bawling. And I was like, "God, no... I don't want to cry... I don't want to be sniffling on my first service here... I don't want Wai Yi to have to turn round and ask me if I'm okay, because I really don't know if I'm okay or not." Yeah, and the musical came up, and distracted things, and frankly, I'm actually quite glad I didn't get the part, because I really don't think I'd have coped. In fact, even in drama practice, I'm getting these "I don't wanna be here " vibes from myself for no apparent reason. I think I'm just tired of the stage. Now is not the time. I want to spend more time on my writing, on my studies, on cultivating friendships, on singing, on music. Anyway, gotta get back to that IRRITATING coursework. Please pray that I'm (we're) doing it right. Sigh. Nyeh... Blessed insurance Coverage is mine Oh what a knowledge Of safety divine Eh whut? Feeling: random |
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July 18th, 2004
reasons why I love my sis ;) POSTED AT 11:16 PM But I seriously want to encourage you… we are ALL equally incapable of doing anything great on our own (even if you think I am able to do stuff. Seriously, I can’t do anything worthwhile, that would last for eternity!) BUT this also means that we are ALL equally capable of doing great things with God! Dearie.. you’re going to be tempted to start blasting yourself again and who God made you to be… it’s always a long journey.. once we think we’ve gotten over something, it rears it’s ugly head. But guess what? That’s why Jesus died hey.. He came to give us a new heart, a heart of flesh, a heart that will GET what He’s trying to say! So every time you get that thought that you’re no good or you’ve got nothing to offer.. you need to keep capturing that thought and bringing it before Jesus, saying to Him “God, I think this way at the moment, but I know that’s not true! I know that You love me and that You have created me with a HUGE destiny. So help me get over myself!” “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments and every high thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ, and being ready to punish all disobedience when your obedience is fulfilled” 2 Cor 10:4-6 I guess I really hope you are encouraged to keep persevering. There will come ONE DAY when those thoughts, the insecurity, the self-blasting, will finally really leave you.. but until then, we need to keep believing God that He is mighty in pulling down strongholds. Can you believe that you will one day be rid of that? Can you believe God that He has great plans for you and that you are extremely important and precious in His sight? I tell you what, as you determine to continue to believe that, you will come to a place of freedom.. the time when you just know that what you used to struggle with no longer holds you. But most people give up at the point of breakthrough. Please don’t do that. PERSEVERE! Always believe the truth that God tells you! Don’t compare yourself to others.. remember that God takes His time to do EVERYTHING right. In fact, I just know God has His hand on your life. You don’t have to be perfect to be used by God. Just love Him and Him alone! Remember, He knows you love Him.. you don’t have to show it or convince other ppl.. because God knows exactly what’s in your heart… and remember, every time a condemning thought comes through your mind.. CAPTURE IT! Believe what God says about you! (and start finding verses that God’s encouraging you with). And hey, even if it’s about a sin in your life you need to remember what God says, that when you repent, you are forgiven. That’s something I keep having to remind myself! Love you!!! Take care… and trust Him… against all odds.. persevere! If you feel discouraged, remember all the times God HAS answered your prayers, or remember how far you have come.. then thank Him. Thanking God will lift your spirits, coz then you’re no longer focusing on yourself but God.. and you’ll realise that you are not the author and the finisher of your own faith, God is. so why worry?! I know , easier said than done. But it CAN be done! Don't you wish she were your sis? Haha... (see... I'm distracted again.) |
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July 19th, 2004
happy birthday, Rowen and Joanne!! POSTED AT 12:14 PM Heh. Anyway. Nice coincidence huh? Two people in the same college and CF on the same day, on the same year. Apparently, reading Yuin's status, Boss and Clem's birthday too (whoever they are). Did like everybody's mom like this date or something? Okay, let's stop being crappy. |
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July 19th, 2004
NO CONDEMNATION POSTED AT 10:49 PM 19 July 2004 And hereby we know that we are of the truth, and shall assure our hearts before him. For if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart and knoweth all things. Beloved, if our heart condemn us not, then have we confidence toward God. 1 John 3:19-21 I was just feeling a little guilty that I missed cell because I was finishing my assignment. Who asked them to have a combine all the way in PJ anyway and have to leave at 6.30pm?? But God has things in His hand, don’t you know? Pastor Lindy actually called to ask how I was… and I told her I was rushing for time, and didn’t know if I could make it and she said it was okay. So… I don’t feel all that totally guilty, though there’s this little niggling thought that I actually didn’t really want to go because it was just sort of ‘games’ thing. BUT… I took the time, spent about 45 minutes reading Bible… and praying… and reading Renewal Theology, and I stumbled across 1 John 3:19-21. It’s not as if I’ve never read it before, but it just suddenly seemed so new and real. The past few days, (weeks, months?) I’ve had these off and on thoughts of whether I’m truly following God, or if I’ve fallen off on the wayside by accident. And suddenly all these verses and encouraging words come up to some of the most innocent comments I gave. My mum reminded me of the song Blessed Assurance, and we sang that in church yesterday. My sister wrote a whole long letter to encourage me (though I didn’t say a word to her – I excerpted her letter in my blog). Josh encouraged me by commenting that he’s seen me grow (though I still don’t know how… haha). And this verse comes and says it right out – God is greater than our hearts and knows all things. He knows when we’re excited for Him. He knows when we’re tired and understands why. He knows our weaknesses and helps us work it out. And even when we feel guilty ourselves that we don’t think we’re doing enough for Him, He reminds us it’s not about doing, but about being. There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus, who walk not after the flesh but after the Spirit. Romans 8:1 Amen. |
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July 20th, 2004
gah!! POSTED AT 02:35 PM Doreen and I went to the library after class because I had one-and-a-half hours to the next class. Went in, looked at books and picked out a few to borrow. Nearing time for the next class we went down to the check-out place. Now the cool thing about this libe is that you check out your own books by scanning your college ID and the books. So I was walking down the stairs with Doreen and I asked her, "Do you know how to use that machine thing?" They'd taught us during the briefing, but I forgot. Anyway, she said she did. I watched her doing it, and they asked for PIN and I was like, "Oh shoot... what's my PIN??" And guess what? When I collected my ID, they gave me a stapled paper with my ID and PIN on it... but I totally forgot what my PIN was!! So I couldn't borrow anything. Felt so stupid... and Doreen kept laughing at me. Oh well, I was laughing at me too. But then after that, we had the final English presentation and then we had some group review thing with the English teacher... and I had NO bad comments! Yay! It was like... you're good, confident... bla bla bla... so yay.
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July 21st, 2004
dum dee dum... dee dum dah... POSTED AT 06:56 PM In the end, I was thinking, maybe I should just review The Canterville Ghost or The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde. I think I'm losing my current game of Freecell.. and I'm at 27 wins!! Trying to beat my 30 wins in a row. Will have to start studying by the end of this week. This weekend will be plenty free... so yah. Sigh. Exams, exams! Had pizza today. Yummy. Still miss US Pizza. They don't have it here. Why aren't people updating their blogs? I'm getting a little bored here!! Sheesh. My yahoo and msn messengers are not connecting! Only Yuin and Rowen are online in ICQ... no don't go... don't go, Rowen.. I'm alone!! Yuin.. where are you?! (She's invisible... and she's invisible when she's not around... so I'm alone online now...) Gah. Time to find some other entertainment. |
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July 21st, 2004
joblessness POSTED AT 11:25 PM Thank you for your (less than) 5 minutes of joblessness. You may now go back to your busy lives. |
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July 24th, 2004
RM1.40.... POSTED AT 12:22 AM Put it down to nervousness... But if you notice, he's the only guy (or one of?) all three judges agreed was quite okay. They have (as far as I remember) not ever agreed that anyone was good. It's always 2 against 1... either way. So means something? Dunno. Favour of God. I think Paul Moss could be kinder, but he does make sense... sometimes. (I like the way Jien always tembaks him back though.. hahah). He just doesn't like those pop-py, sweet kind of Malay song. I suppose because it IS true that the SONG is mediocre - it's very sweet, it doesn't show off what the singer can do. But then he interprets it as the singer was mediocre. Whatever. |
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July 25th, 2004
disturbance... POSTED AT 07:19 PM So half asleep, I reach over and take my handphone to be greeted with this "private number" thing... so it's like "drat.. I HAVE to answer this." A super low voice started talking, and first thing that came to mind is "this had better not be Rowen or I'll kill him" (cos Rowen has a very low voice). And what do you know? It was Hou Tseng (NSCF'98) from Alor Setar, now studying in KL. And why did he call? Because I miss-called at 3 in the afternoon when I was bored. That's what I call super-slow reaction. Gah. By the way, I just found out that KL people (at least Solomon and I think it was Trixie) don't know what "spastic" is. |
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July 26th, 2004
what is a title but a string of words? POSTED AT 10:04 AM Drat... I had something to say earlier this morning, but I forgot what now. Procrastination kills brain cells Oh ya... I have 2 tickets to watch "Do You Hear the People Sing?" Free tickets from Wei-Ling! Yay! Love ya!. I have a stupid book review to do and I'm so brain dead I can't think of anything. Not just what to write... but what book to review! Grrr.... Yay.. Andrew is in!! And I'm talking to my bro online... ahhaha Okay, enough randomness. buh bye |
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July 26th, 2004
short update POSTED AT 11:17 PM Found the words: Blessed Assurance Good night, world. |
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July 27th, 2004
Historical Moment POSTED AT 06:31 PM Yesterday was the day I finally FINISHED reading the Bible from cover to cover!!! Yippee!!! I was almost 2? 3? years in doing it. [yalah.. cacated I know.. but yay! Finally did it!] Second round to come.. hopefully faster... hahahhaha |
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July 27th, 2004
uh... POSTED AT 11:02 PM Had Tomyam for dinner at Zatimani's. Not bad, actually. The faithfulness of God is of the utmost practical significance to the people of God. It is the ground of their confidence, the foundation of their hope, and the cause of their rejoicing. It saves them from the despair to which their own unfaithfulness might easily lead, gives them courage to carry on in spite of their failure, and fills their hearts with joyful anticipations, even when they are deeply conscious they have forfeited all the blessings of God. Another interesting one would be: Omnipresence signifies that God is totally present everywhere in creation. Hence we are not to understand God as spatially spread throughout the universe, so that a part of Him is here, another part there. Just finished chapter 3 of Renewal Theology: God, the World and Redemption. Looking forward to Encounter. Countdown begins. 24 days to encounter / 30 days to exam Reading: Renewal Theology [J. Rodman Williams] |
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July 29th, 2004
go by hearsay... POSTED AT 03:41 PM I'm back on the YA forums... after so long... well, it was down for ages... and I just remembered about it after surfing on to Justin Ng's site. (Synthetic System) He's really gila jazz. Had mamak with cf ppl after last night's erm.. "night watch". They played some irritating game... kena asked questions. At least my questions were kind of general and okay... Some were about secret crushes... and asking girlfriend... ahaha.. the privelege of being a so-called newbie. Trixie said that when she asked her English teacher yesterday how many people are in the review thingy so far, she said... ONE... and that's me! AHhaah... as far as I know, there's a total of 5 now. Me, Trixie, Joanne, Doreen and my class rep. HAha.. guaranteed a prize. 1st prize - RM150 book voucher... 2nd, RM100, 3rd, RM75.. and 5 consolation vouchers of RM50.Oh about the Do You Hear the People Sing thing? "Do You Hear the People Sing?" takes you on a journey through some of the hallmark musicals including earlier Broadway productions such as the The Man of La Mancha, The Fantasticks, Showboat, West Side Story, Carousel, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat as well as more recent additions like The Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables. The repertoire of musical numbers seek to reassure, cheer, reflect, comfort, encourage, conquer, strengthen, inspire, defend, convict, challenge, honour, celebrate and restore. The musical styles are diverse and challenging and there are surprises in store. I have 2 free preview tickets for Tuesday... Whee... 22 days to encounter / 28 days to exams |
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July 30th, 2004
book review: maya POSTED AT 12:02 AM in book review
Starting in the tiny Fijian Island of Taveuni on a windswept January
morning in 1998, Gaarder’s Maya follows Andersen’s search for eternity,
through the mysterious love story of Ana María Maya and José
intertwined with Andalucían Gypsy folklore, their ‘Manifesto’ and Ana’s
uncanny resemblance to Goya’s paintings, to their culmination in the
birth of Ana’s child and Andersen’s reunion with his pregnant wife in
Seville, Spain.
Related partly through Norwegian biologist Frank Andersen’s letter to
his estranged wife, Vera and through the narrative of novelist John
Spooke, the story explores the broad themes of evolution, spiritualism
and Maya, the illusion of the world. Through Frank Andersen’s
conversations with José, Ana and other tourists at the Taveuni inn, we
sketch our way from the Big Bang, to the amphibians and to its final
evolution to human consciousness. His drunken monologues addressed to
Gordon the gecko bring about a tinge of humour whilst emphasising his
blood-brotherhood to his amphibian ancestors.
One intriguing aspect of the story is its interweaving with the
Andalucían gypsy legend of the ageless jester-dwarf that appeared to
Ana María’s ancestors every 52 years since 1790. It was the dwarf’s
manifesto, reworked by Ana María and José, that first drew Andersen to
the couple, and that finally binds Andersen and Vera to each other.
Whilst Maya is intriguing, it is not a book for light reading. Its
broad, sweeping themes and edge of disillusionment, especially
highlighted in the manifesto, raises many questions in the mind of the
reader. Five of clubs of the manifesto reads: If
there is a god, he is not only a wizard at leaving clues behind. More
than anything, he’s a master of concealment. And the world is not
something that gives itself away. The heavens still keep their secrets…
If Gaarder was the god of writing, he is a wizard at leaving clues behind, but his writings still keep their secrets.
Erm. Yah.
Listening to: These Ordinary Days [Jars of Clay] |
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July 31st, 2004
scribbler POSTED AT 02:12 PM One thing bad about starting to scribble at church services is that everytime I start writing I get really really introspective, and all the bubbliness that I've cultivated and rubbed off from people like May and Trixie and Wai Yi and all the other SIB people just disappears like a bubble and I get all withdrawn and quiet like back in Penang. Then they ask if I'm okay, and really I am, so I just say I'm tired. Which in fact, I am, but if I hadn't started thinking so much, I wouldn't have felt anway. They've only ever seen the happy, bubbly, crazy side of me, because they rub off on me. They haven't really seen the quiet part. Yes, and pray for Pastor Lindy. After some blood test thingy she knocked her head and now her "old symptoms" (or whatever it is) of nausea and amnesia is back.. for a while. (When she was younger, she really banged her head during diving and lost her memory for a while). I think they said there's a blood clot in her brain. Yeah.. and Josh's visa. |
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