Entries for May, 2006
May 1st, 2006
the list POSTED AT 07:46 PM *ahem* From Canaanland: From Times: Is thoroughly swimming in books. Started to organise things and attempt packing. The room is a landmine. Don't know where to start. 2 talked!
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May 6th, 2006
-away- POSTED AT 05:16 PM Sorry. Just dropping by to put up an away sign. I returned my internet on Tuesday morning and haven't been online since. Will be back in Penang on Weds and normal blogging will resume. Haha chao |
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May 8th, 2006
hooray for Ray! POSTED AT 01:44 PM Haha... I'm currently onlining in Ray's house. Aiiircooonnn.... Streamyxxxx... *so sweets* Uhhmmmmm........... Hm. nothing to say. Hahah. Busy. Doing nothing. How fun, right? Got to study laaaahhh... Later lah. When I'm back in Penang. Haha. Must holiday first. Always jaga the holidays. Nyeh. |
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May 11th, 2006
*ahem* POSTED AT 12:07 PM Selamat Tuhan Kurniakan That's if I've got the words right. (Haven't sung it since sec school... almost 5 years!!) --- I've come to the feeling that it's somehow time to "burst forth in glorious day" out of the relative shelter and anonymity I've been travelling under. The question really is how fast, and how much to "burst forth" in. Already, spoke to Aunty Maria on the phone and she's like... "oh, you're back for good. Good... good... I know who to call already." Already, dad's going like... "so you'll be helping in the Saturday service? Do drama for me... get dancers... my e-community newsletter... the cafe.." (the CAFE?? What on earth do I have to do with the CAFE??? Get live performances konon. Haha. I say get it open regularly first laahh.) Oohs. Wells. We shalls takes things one steps at a times. With ACCA exam in June. And college results out on 18 May. Ho-hums. --- Oh yes, the travelling. We left around 3 something... it was starting to rain in KL... KL crying cos I'm leaving konon. Hehe. ANYWAYS. Didn't take the Sungai Buloh turn off. Followed the old Ipoh highway and got jammed at Rawang. Nearly an hour to get out of that. But also good thing, cos we heard on the radio that Sg Buloh was flooded. Haha. Then after that we took AGES to find our way back to the North-South highway cos the signs were so bad!! Only found our way out at Tanjung Malim. And then I took over the wheels and drove until Tapah rest stop for dinner. Hahahahahah... Whee... Anyways. Reached home at about 10 plus. And JC asked "So... late? Your car so slow meh?" YES. MY CAR SO SLOW. Hahahahaha. Listening to: inside out - nate sallie |
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May 11th, 2006
BIG? POSTED AT 08:40 PM in thoughts Was browsing through A Swiftly Tilting Planet (Madeleine L'Engle) and there was this part where the Pastor Mortmain was trying to get Zylle burned at stake for being a "witch". They said a rune, and there was lightning, thunder and rain. And... stuff. Can't remember exactly what happened. ANYWAY what I was thinking of then was this: how come some people have such a small view of God that any "power" seen is automatically attributed to the devil? Doesn't believing in God the creator of heaven and earth brand him as all powerful? Why can't then POWER be seen as His mark instead of the devil's? The other day in cell, someone brought up the issue of some picture put in the office and whether it has any spiritual powers behind it and all that stuff. I don't know. I was just wondering, how is it that some people can be so afraid of demons and spirits? Don't they know that Jesus is bigger than them all? But then again, I suppose each has his or her own measure of faith. I guess that even while I don't really struggle with this issue of seeing "spirits" behind everything, I still have problems believing in miracle healings and seeing them happen (Haven't seen one yet.) I suppose its just the way people worry about spirits behind everything that irks me to some extent. Is it really necessary that there be some form of evil spirit behind every thing? Then this whole thing with the Da Vinci code also. So it's a story. So it has stuff contrary to Bible teachings. So does a lot of things. So does the Judas gospels. I think what Jo's pastor said was pretty good. According to her, he said that we should not be afraid of the Da Vinci Code. And that's true. We should not be afraid. Because our God is bigger than that. And the truth will hold out. I did not quite agree though, that "not being afraid" means that we should go out and encourage people to read it. Let each judge according to his faith. Reading it for me was just that. A story. But for others, it may turn to be a stumbling block. For others, it could be a spur towards the truth. As pastors have been saying, we should be prepared. People will ask questions. Some may want to find out whether it's true. Whether we believe such things, and if not, what do we believe? And yes, we should be prepared. To be prepared is not to hide our faces and protest and deny that such a book was written or such a movie was done. To be prepared is not to launch a full-blown strike or war march like the muslims did when those cartoons of the prophet was made. To be prepared is to find out what has been said so that we can answer in clarity, and to the point. --- This is what my bro just wrote (honest): "My brother is the most annoying boy on earth." Seeing he's the only boy in the house, he must be talking about himself. Unless he has an imaginary brother. Heh. |
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May 12th, 2006
the depth of struggle POSTED AT 11:57 PM "I must admit, I have been quite protected throughout my entire life. It is the by-product of the virtuous living of my parents. The value of that by-product however, lies not in my parents’ hands, but rests solely on the sovereignty of God. We let Him lead my life and make it look just the way He likes it. Who I am today is really God’s moulding of my life. It is to my benefit that I did not become one of those pastor’s kids who end up falling away from the faith. I’ve heard a lot of such stories. And it saddens me deeply." Was reading Wai Nyan's post. (Yeah, it was a while back, but I was internetless.)It's something that I've thought of too, lots and lots of times. Sometimes I wonder, so where's my testimony? Where's that miraculous save / change? You know, everytime they have those workshops on how to share your testimony to your friends, I always have this uncomfortable feeling of not being able to share anything. What is there to say? Sure, there are changes. There are struggles we face. But nothing dramatic. Nothing marked enough to say, "Look, this was before, and then He happened." But then again, doesn't God order the paths of the righteous and keep him safe from harm? Isn't that in itself a testimony of God's goodness, that He has kept me safe in His paths? One of the things I was thinking about when reading that post, was this: by-product of the virtuous living of our parents, yes. But don't you think it was also because you made a conscious decision to continue in the faith? (Then I read it again and realised that he did mention something about that.) Am currently in a bit of a muddly stage. You know the stage where you kind of know what you're supposed to be doing, but are not quite doing it yet? And you have these confuzzledy conflicting thoughts that go "yes you should get off your bum and do it" and then also go "oh, it's okay. It'll keep. God understands..." Hm. Garnering will power is often the biggest struggle of all. You know what's sometimes freaky about being a PK? It's the fact that of those who know / were given more, more will be required. And it's like, given the rich heritage we have, we've been given so much, so much more will be required. Expected. Not just from God, but from man. |
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May 13th, 2006
scratch POSTED AT 11:42 AM in thoughts Have this feeling of only always scratching the surface. Question is, how do you dig deeper in? There is more, surely, to what I want to say. But it doesn't seem to come out. Or it doesn't seem to come out right. And yet, I shy away from conflict. Inarticulate. Afraid. Speak. |
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May 14th, 2006
May 15th, 2006
quote for the day POSTED AT 05:18 PM But the trouble with deep belief is that it costs something. And there is something inside me, some selfish beast of a subtle thing that doesn't like the truth at all because it carries responsibility, and if I actually believe these things I have to do something about them. It is so, so cumbersome to believe anything. Hm. Am trying to study. Am getting lazy. Shall try doing something other than stare at the text book. Maybe like stare at the past year questions. Or something. I dunno. It's hot, hot, hot, which makes me lazy, lazy, lazy. (Or rather, I'm just lazy anyways.) Thinking a tad too much. The heat? Or home? Or some sort of revolution from my bed? (In my head) Haha. Argh. I. Shall. Go. Do. Something. Productive. Now. I. Hope.
Take me to the place where you go, Don't Look Back in Anger, Oasis |
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May 16th, 2006
what I did... POSTED AT 10:25 PM Sorted out some old stuff. Reconfirmed I'm a Melancholy-Phlegmatic personality. Watched Poseidon. Talked a lot. Stared at my text book. Carried text book and papers from room to room. 6 Sudoku and counting. Chatting to JC, Ivan, Paul and Ee Laine. Chatted with Edrian and (his) mum. Rated more music on Launch Cast. Made my own station on Launch Cast Chatted with Henry. Checked e-mail. Listened to music. Updates blog. |
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May 18th, 2006
May 18th, 2006
in desperation POSTED AT 04:42 PM coming soon? --- At any rate, I was so brilliant that I rolled over my own toe while sitting on the roller chair (the office kind with wheels). Plaster, anyone? |
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May 20th, 2006
book reviews POSTED AT 03:17 PM in book review I'd a-done this for R.AGE. Don't know if it came out. Assume it did. Haha. My "newspaper supplier" back in KL didn't go to Uni around the days I think it appeared, so I wouldn't know. Anyways. Might as well put it up, since it's written.
Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland Lewis Carroll  What happens when you follow a talking white rabbit down a rabbit-hole? Alice takes that chance and encounters an easily offended Mouse, a flustered White Rabbit, a grinning Cheshire Cat, the Mock Turtle and many other memorable characters. Having fallen down the rabbit-hole, Alice discovers a fifteen-inch high door opening into a beautiful garden. In an attempt to enter the garden, she eats and drinks various substances, managing to grow and shrink herself multiple times. Due to her bizarre experiences, she finds herself unable to remember her lessons, or to describe who she is to the creatures she meets as she is quite sure she is not herself anymore. Finally ending up in the beautiful garden, she plays croquet the Queen of Hearts, whose favourite line is, “Off with his head!” and attends the trial of the Knave of Hearts. Filled with brilliant wordplay, absurd misunderstandings, strange occurrences and laughable rhymes, this nonsensical book is best enjoyed in the midst of your dry notes and textbooks.
George’s Marvellous Medicine Roald Dahl Did you know that eating caterpillars gives you brains? Faced with the grumpiest “grunion of a Grandma” you could ever imagine, George finds himself with the tremendous urge to do something drastic about her. In Dahl’s typical humorous manner, George bursts into rhyme about making a magic medicine that will either “cure her completely, or blow off the top of her head.” He then throws everything he can find in the house, and out of it, into an enormous saucepan to brew his medicine. Accompanied by Quentin Blake’s illustrations, Dahl sketches in your imagination the semi-tragic story of what finally happens to Grandma. Tragic, of course, to Grandma; but definitely hilarious in the eyes of the reader.
The Ratastrophe Catastrophe David Lee Stone Dullitch, the city-capital of Illmoor is infested with rats – giant, red-eyed rats. The Council of Dullitch has promised (without telling the Duke) a thousand crowns of gold to the one who can rid the city of them. Stone takes the well-worn tale of the Pied Piper and injects it with magic, dwarfs, barbarians, goblins, trolls and other mystical creatures to come up with this thoroughly enjoyable tale of planned revenge and inadvertent mishap. Diek Wustapha, our Pied Piper, is held in the grip of a mysterious dark magic that enables him to charm all sorts of animals and people by playing his flute. When he enchants away the children of Dullitch in revenge for being cheated of his just reward, it falls to the unlikely foursome of Groan Teethgrit the Barbarian, Gordo Goldeaxe the dwarf, Tambor Forestall the ex-council chairman and his grandson Jimmy Quickstint to somehow track him down, return the children and save the Duke from being stoned by his own subjects. The manipulations of the Duke, the ineffectiveness of the Council, the grudging help of the outlaws Groan and Gordo, the failed magic of Tambor and Jimmy’s bumbling actions are woven together into a magical story of greed, treachery, magic, bravery, and pure silliness.
Reaper Man Terry Pratchett What happens when Death goes missing? Following an accusation by the three auditors of reality, (rather like the revenue, as Miss Flitworth understands it) Death is dismissed from his duty on the charge of acquiring a personality. In Ankh-Morpork, a town already populated by all sorts of creatures from trolls, to dwarfs, goblins and vampires, the appearance a few more of the undead doesn’t make much of a difference. Strange things start to happen though, as the spirits start to jostle for space and Windle Poon’s spirit walks back into his dead body for want of a better place to go. Screws start to unscrew themselves, clothes run away, strange souvenir glass globes appear, as do strange “wire baskety wheely things” and signs proclaiming “Sale!!! Starts tomorrow!!!” flit down from the sky. In the meantime, Death preoccupies himself with the Miss Flitworth’s wheat harvest in an effort to live out his remaining time in the most meaningful and useful way possible. Using his subtle humour to poke fun at the shopping mall phenomena, Pratchett manages to make one wonder at the seemingly meaningless things one encounters in life.
Odds and Gods Tom Holt The gods have retired and are stuck in Sunnyvoyde Residential Home with a lot of time on their hands. Thor, Odin and Frey have finally fixed up the traction engine and have flown off in search of adventure – but mostly in search of the way home. Pan has just started work doing commercials on television. The lawyer Julian is trying to get his godfather, Osiris, certified insane so that he can inherit all his powers and gain control over the universe. And Kurt Lundqvist, the renowned killer of supernatural beings has turned down Julian’s job offer of killing Osiris (killing gods are not impossible, merely against his principles). When all these wacky characters (and more) meet, chaos and hilarity ensues. The book’s strength is mainly in the witty and hilarious exchanges between the characters and its wealth of characters (mainly retired gods) acting as comic relief. Holt’s tongue-in-cheek paraphrasing of well-known sayings (the Law is my shepherd, wherefore I shall have nothing) and his irreverent treatment of the squabbling and quirky gods makes for light reading and hearty laughs. *all pics sourced from amazon.com |
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May 21st, 2006
SONday POSTED AT 11:20 AM Thought for the day: Are you changing the world, or is it changing you? --- More than words, You are --- You know the verse that says Satan comes to steal, kill and destroy? I was just thinking today, if Satan can't destroy you, since you're God's child, he'll sure do his best to DISTRACT you, so you can't be effective where you are. |
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May 22nd, 2006
hmm. POSTED AT 03:00 PM in thoughts Heavy bands around my heart. Been thinking of a few friends. Really, what determines if one stays within the protective circles of the church, and what makes one leave? What makes one A searching mind, maybe. Questioning practices, rituals. Maybe some can be discarded. Some, really, needs to be prodded, measured up to Bible teachings, held to the light, prayed over, and settled - not with man - but in your heart, with God. Dissatisfaction with others. Sometimes an understanding of human nature or an observing nature leads one to be able to see other's hypocrisies. Too quiet a person, too thoughtful a person, and you see (or think you see) a lot of mismatched things between what people do and say. And when they try to correct the perceived wrongs in you, you can't respect them enough to be corrected. Maybe, maybe not. Life, in general, that leads one to believe that not only in the church can things be pure and beautiful. And that is true - only, we humanly grasp at the idea of "set aside, God's priesthood" to mean that we are above, or better than, others who are not in the church. Fallacy. The only distinction is that we have accepted the grace and mercy of God's salvation. It means that we have acknowledged our need of Him. It does not mean that we are, of ourselves, any better. It does not mean that non-Christians cannot be more loving, more giving, more charitable and kindly than ourselves. I wrote (rather ramblingly)in fireplace the other day about judging. I have come to a conclusion. In the end, all that really matters is the state of your heart. If you can, in full confidence, say that your life is right with God - no matter what other people may think or say or do - then you are right with God. Because your spiritual life is between you and God, not between you and man. And if you have peace in your heart to live how you do, then go ahead, knowing that God is your judge, and not man. And even if I cannot (don't know how to?) accept the way you live because I have convictions otherwise, it is not for me to judge you or to accuse you, but to speak what I believe in humility and truth, then leave you to your conscience and to God. But at the same time I will pray for both you and me. You, that you will continue to grow in God (in spite of, or because of(?), what I said), and me, that I will not judge you, but will continue to love and accept you in Christ, no matter what you do. -this is not a post against / about any one person, but rather an accumulation of thoughts concerning a few friends of mine and my (sometimes) judgemental thoughts towards them. Shalls (try to remember to) pray more- Feeling: heavy-hearted |
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May 23rd, 2006
52 - I POSTED AT 04:09 PM I have this thing for countdowns. Don't ask me why. It just makes me happy. I like counting down to exams, even though the numbers don't do much to motivate me until it "suddenly" reaches single digits. So. Because I like countdowns, and because it's getting harder and harder (not really harder, just getting lazier) to think of titles, I shall make my title a countdown. To what? You'll find out soonlah. As it goes now, unless I've counted wrongly (you see ah, this cacated accountant still can't really count), I have 52 days and 13 alphabets. So that means I add an alphabet every 4 days. How fun! Reading: corporate finance Listening to: adam watts |
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May 24th, 2006
51 - i; and sadness POSTED AT 01:02 PM
SIGH. *attempts to mug* so sad sooooo saaaaaddd shhhhoooo shhhhaaaadddd The results have shown... I'm not as smart as I thought. Hahahhahhahahhahahhaha Last sem's results were pretty good. 2 As and a B. Not bad at all. This sem... SIGH CGPA: 3.1355. Oh-kay lah. Not bad lah. I graduate with merit. And I "achieved" my first two C's in 4 years of studying at TARC. What a sad way to end the course! *mugs* --- * for the uninitiated, "mugging" is a slang for *studying*. If you do not know that, go read more books. Thank you. |
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May 24th, 2006
51 - i; and bored POSTED AT 11:25 PM Boredom is a symptom of laziness. We are bored because we are too lazy to do anything. This is true, because... Bah. Dum dee dum. *looks around* -This has been another random blog- *smiles and leaves*
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May 25th, 2006
50 - i; and what's a huggle? POSTED AT 08:19 PM I was chatting with Wai Nyan yesterday, and gave him *huggles* because he sounded disappointed in his blog. This made him ask, "what's a huggle?" So, what is a huggle? I don't know if I picked up that word from somewhere (probably Jo!), but anyway, here's my explanation: A huggle is a hug that is less... serious. See, I'm not the kind of person who feels comfortable dispensing hugs. I don't initiate hugs. If someone initiates one, I accept and hug back. But I'm not a very huggy person. In some way or another, that translates back into chatting and writing, and it just feels somewhat weird to go *hugs* online. In addition, while a *hug* might be okay for a very close friend, or someone of the same sex, it also feels weird for someone whom I don't really know that well, or someone of the opposite sex. So, how? You send a *huggle* In other explanations, a huggle is also a hug + a giggle, which means the same thing as above, because hugs are serious and giggles are not. So a huggle is a light-hearted hug, sent in friendship from me to you, when you're feeling down. =) Haha, and my mom will now say that I'm "too free." 18 days to ACCA. |
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May 26th, 2006
49 - i POSTED AT 01:40 PM Another cheque from the STAR came in the mail today. Hm. How nice. Does anyone have copies of the R.AGE from April until now? I wanna have a look over and LOOK FOR MY ARTICLES!! Haha... So hard to get a copy. Supposedly lah, TARC KL has, but I haven't seen any anywhere, and I've already left at any rate. UTAR has, and I used to get it from Dih Haw, but he doesn't always get the newspapers, and I don't always go over, and no one seems to read the R.AGE anyway, so YAH. I don't know when, or where it came out, but I wanna see. And keep. If possible. So, anyone has? Oh yes, and another thing. My friends in KL want to sell their double-decker bed. RM160, good condition, should be at most 2 years old only. Interested? Lemme know kays. Soon.
The Five Love LanguagesMy primary love languages are probablyActs of Service and Words of Affirmation. Complete set of results
InformationUnhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.Take the quiz |
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May 27th, 2006
48 - in POSTED AT 09:35 PM This has not exactly been a productive day, although I tried psyching it up to be. Hm. This either needs more willpower, or less distraction - possibly both. Still. I have at least a couple of hours to redeem the day. And I shall. 16 days to ACCA. Still so unprepared. Listening to: restored - jeremy camp |
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May 28th, 2006
47 - in POSTED AT 03:00 PM in? I -need You, Lord --- Today, I think I started zoning out at one point, because I heard "When you throw the fishermen in the sea..." (I think he actually said 'fishing net') Bleh. *slaps self* "We also need to differentiate between spiritual warfare and the natural outcome of living in a fallen world." *nods head* So true. Bad things happen because this is a fallen world, and there isn't necessarily some "evil spirits" causing it to happen. Instead of looking for demons and powers of darkness behind every stone, we should be looking instead to the light of Christ that makes the darkness flee. Because where there is light, there can be no darkness.
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May 30th, 2006
45 - in POSTED AT 10:09 PM in thoughts I registered at iBridge (forums) today. It looks / sounds interesting... and I am recognising a few names in the member list that I have been following somewhat anonymously and sporadicly as mood dictates (when I'm too free). Writers and bloggers and emergentists. Or friends of friends. Small world. Haha.
Hm. They have this "HeadStart" programme thing. Am hearing bits and pieces from Emmeline and Jimmy. Hopefully they only start after when I've settled from "wandering" ahaha. (The name Emmeline still sounds like I know her. Oh well, see what she replies in her e-mail... heh) Wondering if I should sign up at the yahoo groups yet. But I looked at the e-mail stats, and I don't think I want to handle such an influx of e-mails at this point of time. Maybe later. --- Talking about desperation, (see forums which are quite dead, still waiting for promo site to be up --> ) what exactly are we desperate for? Hype? Crowds? Involvement? Good music? Great worship? Inspiring preaching? I don't know. Maybe I'm being pessimistic or overly critical or something (mel-phleg, what to do?), but I do think that while the leaders have the vision, the youth do not look like they have caught it yet. It's just another event. in DESPERATION, but have we defined what we are desperate for?
I've lost somewhat my "feel" for big rallys ever since the last PS concert/conference (quite possibly even earlier). I could just be getting old, I dunno. It just sometimes seems so pointless. All that buzz, all that hype, and for what? It seems to me like just a Christian version of a celebrity concert. Yah, going to praise and worship lah, but also to jump and scream when our favourite artist starts singing, also to ogle at the cute singer / drummer / bassist / guitarist, etc. ("wah, he play so chun, man! Wah.. his / her voice soooo nicceeee... Autograph! Autograph! *swoon*" Or maybe I'm just not girly enough to enjoy stuff like that... ahha). And later on, they seem just the same. I sometimes think (don't sue me) that the people most hyped about concerts and extended P&W and rallies tend to be those who will jump the highest during worship, sing the loudest, fidget the most in service, pass notes & SMS during the sermon while eating sweets, cry during altar call, ask for encore from the band after the talking's done and then say it was a great meeting. Sometimes. Not all. Bleh. Whatever. --- What are we desperate for? Desperate for God. Okay, desperate for God for what? For Him to move. Move? In what way? To feel His presence... Oh. So how exactly do you feel His presence? (okay, let's not go there) So, what exactly were we desperate for again? God's presence. As defined by? Conviction. Conviction in what? In the truth of His Word, in the power of the Resurrection, in His gift of salvation, in the reality of His love. And all this can only come about in doing this rally? No... not really. So what was this rally for again? ... *this has been anna, pessimist, in interview with anna, fervent supporter of youth rally 06. For more updates, please tune in (maybe) tomorrow, (maybe not) same time, same place* --- Could we just define it as being desperate to bless His heart? --- But this is YOUR dream, and we will run with you, like you ran with ours. |
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May 31st, 2006
44 - inD POSTED AT 03:00 PM Click here for an interesting article. (It's probably outdated by now...) --- Not to be overcritical or anything, but I was listening to a self-recorded CD... and it makes me wince half the time. Which leads one to remember that careful attention must always be paid to the tempo, the rhythm, and the exact notes of the songs. And don't slide! Holding notes are hard to maintain, don't wobble... And if it isn't up to scratch, please, for goodness' sake record it AGAIN. *shuts up* |
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