And so he asked me why I missed kayell.

I guess I miss...

the college peeps
lex. ziggie. rowen. solo. becca. jasmine. dih. shawn. lings. edwin.

the church peeps
julian. jayne. yarn. fayz.

the jammin' (and aborted song writing)
ed. jc. honyau. rayz. lex

the hanging places
om's. mali's. brj. mrj. hostel. jr. jj. bk. alexis. danau.

the ibridgers
pg. sim. debs. and now ben.

the unclassifiable stuff
bry. cf. christmas night. af. 1800. sandwiches and peaches party. midnight walks. cg. hostel grounds in the moonlight. ym. randomness.

I guess it's a lot about the people I met there, though a few aren't there anymore, and holding on to friendships made and relationships built. I realise I wasn't much into church people. They had their cliques, and I had mine, and I guess we never really gelled.

But I think what I miss most about kayell, is the person that I change into when I am there. The bright, chipper, outgoing, confident, friendly, capable person that I am when I am on my own. The ability to go randomly crazy with people I trust. The weightlessness of knowing that no one knows who I am or where I come from.

And yet I can only wish to bring that home to where I am.

I wonder why.

I'm aiming for this :NWZ-W202PNK

Maybe for my 3-year mark (28 days) or my birthday (83 days), depending how early I feel like I'm levelling up the hole London made in my pocket. And yes, and I do want it in pink.

I haven't done my intended camera post.

Will do so one day, if I remember.

For those who are not on facebook, you can (apparently) click on to see the photo albums without logging in, using these links:

Album 1

Album 2

Album 3

Album 4

Yeah, hope it works.

Because I just got a new camera, I got nostalgic.

It was a family tradition that everyone got their own camera on their twelfth birthday. This was mine:

That was back in '96, so it was, quite obviously, a film camera. I think it only cost about RM100++ back then because it was on 50% discount or something.

(top / back / bottom)

It was fun - for the first few times, I would trick people that it was really a toy camera... and take candid snapshots of people. That didn't work for very long, though. The thing I didn't like about it was that... you could never take a 'secret' shot, per se, because it was EXTREMELY NOISY (and because everyone would look at it when I took it out as it was so bright)! Everyone would know when you took a picture, and who took it.

I think this camera was handled by a lot of people and was a major conversation starter/continuer, because everyone wanted to look at it. It was also the cause of a major blow up when some unsuspecting bloke in the process of inspecting it and fiddling with the buttons during JYR, accidentally opened the back casing and exposed the film.

It definitely was an 'old faithful' as it lasted me from '96 up until about '03 or so when I got my spaceship camera. It also survived being dropped from the table after NSCF camp. Haha. It's still hiding in the back of my cupboard, and probably works - well, it was still working when I gently put it out of use.

Ah, memories.

Well, this is a picture of a picture of the new one, but I don't think it will be much of a conversation starter!

you can tell when i'm bored when i suddenly have a lot of blog posts.

well, i'm not exactly bored. i'm just lazy. i have things to do, if i would do it, like writing and reading and work, but i am too lazy at the moment.

well i am just lazy.

hahah.

this is a lazy post.

i'm being randomly randomly random.

because i have nothing else to do. wait i do have things to do. i just don't want to do it now.

procrastination is heady. like a shot to the head.

euphoric.

i don't know what to do now. i have been doing stupid quizzes on facebook and trolling friends lists for new friends. troll.

i wanted to wiki something earlier, while in the car, but i don't remember what it is anymore.

they said to improve your writing you need to set a number of words to write a day, regardless if you feel like it, or have anything to write about. i guess this is it.

free-flow writing.

and the anti-caps is due to laziness. because i am too lazy to press the shift button.

at any rate, it looks alright. haha. for now.

i am not irritated at it yet. but i might be tomorrow. but then by then i will be too lazy to log in to purposely caps the write letters.

i told you i am lazy.

thank you rowen for stupid conversations. i will let you know if i'm bored enough. hahahahahaha.

i don't believe i'm even thinking of it.

this is stupid.

tomorrow i am going to hate this post because it is so stupid and random and badly written, but as of now i don't care.

now i am going to strywriting without pressing hte delet or backspace at all and ish this is crazy. hahaha. i am going to be very irriated by that by this line . sentence whateve ryou call it tomorrow. f ahaaaa.. i keep forgetting and pressing the backspace, it's habit. ish ish ish. as you can tell i am bored. i a m lazy. and bored. and i need soemthing to bdo. better to do. with my time than write stupid nonsense posts like this . help me. hellp ememeee. hmmm i wonder how long i can go n without gettin gfrus. actually i am a bit fursn now already and i dont' knwo if you can understand what i am writing. but actually i think my typing is pretty good because i haven't had to stop myself from backspacing in a while . it goes to show tha tyou need to concentrate and not syp type so fast, bht bleh though i amt yping at my normal speed and now you see all the stupid mistakes coming upa gian. ahahahahaha.

ok. i'm stopping here.

good night.

So I surfed by yuin's and saw this:

and then i got inspired to do this.

Happy reading. It's been ten months since i last published, apparently.

the days, they fly
but the minutes, they crawl
i try to climb high
but it's easier to fall

[Opening line credits to Susanna Khoo]

And i'm stuck already. Obviously now is not a good time for writing poems. Haha.

---

Dropped by at Wesley Methodist's young adults cell. Awesome bunch of people. We're going places.

Thanks Jared for the invite. (Hm, the punctuation's not quite right.)

---

You know what, I really need to work on the pitch. I also really need to work on getting my facts right and assembled in order. Most of all, I also need to work on not talking so loud.

I really, really, really need to work on not. talking. so. loud. Especially when I get excited.

Argh.

And here I was, thinking I was such a quiet person. Haha!

by Anna Tan and Susanna Khoo

-a collaborative poem-

the days, they fly
but the minutes, they crawl
i try to climb high
but it's easier to fall

into comforts familiar
down these winding steps
onto these well-worn pathways
into familiar traps

yet on the horizon a glimmer
a wish, a hope, a dream
the days have flown by
still, no nearer it seems

time, please stop
do not eat me away
these fragile thoughts
should not be your prey

all i have, precious
jewels that i harbour
all i ask is another
second, minute, hour

to love, live, pray and give
to put my words in song
to remember all the good
to take back all the wrong

the minutes, they crawl
yet as ever they speed by
and as everything piles
again we wonder why

the days, they fly
by me, still unaware
yet there's time to amend
if i would just stop to care

---

I'm late. Susanna and I wrote this over gtalk last night, and she already posted it here. (Yeah, check out her blog...)

Well, so now that's posted here as well, for the full benefit of... of whoever it may be.

It really started off with the first line, which was her status on gtalk. And then I wrote the snippet on the earlier post. And then I told her about it. And then... well, it took off from there.

I love collaborations. Now who want's to collaborate on a novel? Hehe.

I wrote a lovely birthday post with video link and photos for my two lovely friends, and TABULAS IS GIVING ME A BLANK POST.

I sad!

I very very very sad.

AND I DID IT TWICE.

Not happy not happy not happy.

*snifff*

because your smile's infectious

because you're outrageously alive, and madly creative

because you make me laugh

because i can't imagine you not being my friend

because you're always there

you're one of the most generous people i've ever known

i love you

“Follow the Light” is an original Christmas musical written by Nick Choo, to be directed by Colin Kirton, and staged at PJ Live Arts from 3-13 December 2009, with rehearsals starting in early to mid September 2009.

Open auditions will be held as follows for the 9 principal and 8 ensemble characters in the cast.

Date: Tue 28 and Wed 29 July 2009

Time: 7:30-11:30 pm

Venue: A11-12, Pelangi Utama Condos, Bandar Utama

More info here.

You talented people out there, do this for me.

Because I want this bad, but I'm not there.

Because it's Colin Kirton.

Because my job would never allow it.

Sigh.

Tell me your stories. Let me live vicariously through your eyes.

Peek
It's a long way to go
I can't see the end
Can you?

Peer
It's narrow, don't you think
I'm thin enough to pass
Aren't I?

Squint
I wonder what's beyond
Could it be wonderful
You think?

Wonder
It's a secret garden they say
But if it was they wouldn't know
Would they?

Touch
The hedges are so prickly
They've kept many out before
Haven't they?

Smell
Such a beautiful fragrance
I think there are flowers at the end
Don't you?

Step
I don't know if I'm allowed
But someone would have said,
Wouldn't they?

Pause
It could be dangerous in there
But it's not safe here either
Is it?

Fidget
I can't stand it anymore
I'm sure it should be something good
Shouldn't it?

Run
I'm taking this path anyway
Mysteries are fun
Aren't they?

The problem is, i really feel better after venting and griping, even if it's not a very nice thing to do.

The problem is, the more you nag, the more i refuse to help you because you annoy me.

The problem is... you're just plain annoying. Bleh.  

Thank God for Boss, my moving-away neighbour and stupid conversations like this:

Boss: so, u help me ..i cry here la my PL macam langsung canot out
me: i cry here u cry there la. we both cry together la
Boss: cry............................
me: cry...........................
Neighbour: u both cry then later flood in penang and cos by anna tan and flood in kl cos by boss
Boss: haha..both of u very free in ofis wo..
me: we both already siao in ofis

---

(later at 8pm)

 Neighbour: wah..boss....how dare u watch drama in front of ur junior s......
not like u wor....u shd work one wor.....

 Boss: i don watch now 

 

 Boss: i watch after back to apartment here

  Neighbour: of course u not watch now la

  u watch now, ten willl be a big news tat boss watch drama at work

 Boss: haha....

 Neighbour: u watch at apartment with ur juniors a?>

hahahaha

 Boss: hehe...we watch separately

 Neighbour: u keep on typing this msg , not need to work a...

  go back to work boss

  later ur PL cannot vomit or give birth out a

Boss: aih...i sian la...i macam 1 2 resign la

  cannot cope with this kind of lousy client

 me: boss... u cannot resign until after i resign...... 

  Neighbour: u oso cannot resign until i resign----

  u have to backup us

 Boss: u both ah............

 so free at ofix pun wo...

 me: i laugh until stomach ache dy...

  she la so free

  disturb me nya

 Boss: ask her to help u lo

----

haha.